Sex Detox: Just in Time for Valentine's Day

Rather than get sucked in to buying some big nasty box of chocolates, or like my husband likes to give me, pink carnations, I figured this year I'd really try to make Valentine's Day more productive.

And I'm not talking about banging so much that we end up having quadruplets productive.

I'm talking about Dr. Ian Kerner's new book Sex Detox, a 30-day program that is aimed at recharging your desire, revitalizing your intimacy, and rejuvenating your love life.

All without sex.

Now before you run away laughing, you have to know that the idea of not having sex for 30-days isn't that far-fetched for most parents. You say "Wow, I'm already doing the sex detox diet -- why I am still so unhappy."

And the point Dr. Kerner makes is that by eliminating sex, you can focus on what's really going on. And to do so, he offers 30-days worth of exercises and quizzes to help you along.

To be frank, if you're really in a toxic relationship, then I say grab the book and bring it to a therapist, because chances are, you're not going to be able to get your spouse to do it with you. In fact, I'm betting that even if your relationship is just in need of minor repair, it's still going to be a bit hard. For some people, talking openly about sex is incredibly easy and for others, it's worse than pulling teeth.

And even making a concerted effort to do this book may not make it any easier. So a third party might just be the way to go.

I just don't think you can do this book without your partner involved (if you're doing the couples program). That being said, good luck getting your partner to do it with you. Considering I can't get my husband to watch a chick flick, I'm pretty sure he won't be doing any breathing exercises with me.

However, you can pick and choose your battles, and pick and choose how you want to make the program work for you. So, you don't do the breathing exercises, but you do work together on the quizzes.

The book is meant to help your relationship. It's not just about sex (isn't that always the case?). And I have to say that having those moments every day where you are focusing on each other is the best Valentine's Day gift you can give each other.

Except maybe something like this.

So, grab a copy of sex detox, a bunch of bottles of wine, and make a commitment to make a change.

(And make sure to read Mominatrix -- that always helps ease the mood when it comes to talking about sex).